Feb. 27th, 2016

wardofregret: (Default)
February has been such a whirlwind month of an emotional roller coaster. I applied for a whole lot of different jobs as January ended and February began because typically, my hours at work are now averaging about 20 to 25 if I'm very lucky. Last week I worked three days. Several different museums located in Louisville were hiring for a variety of positions (The Frazier History Museum, The Speed Art Museum on the University of Louisville's campus, and The Kentucky Derby Museum) and I also applied to several positions close to home. and, well, I suppose this is what I get for having a marathon job application session.

I got my slew of email rejections from the Frazier for every position, whether it was as exhibits manager or applying as a damn housekeeper. Stillwater Music in Nashville asked me about my internship experience even though I didn't qualify their requirements for a junior archivist.

My first email was with the staff of the Speed Art Museum. I had a phone interview on a Wednesday, and then the next Friday I had an in person interview with the Guest Services Manager/Volunteer Coordinator. It was primarily customer service type of work, but seeing as it was in a museum environment I was more than fine with that. Of course, I got offered the job last week and I had to turn it down because it was part time at only 16-20 hours a week, even with the place I lived in for my internship, I could not afford to relocate on that few hours.

At this same time i had applied for two seperate postings with the Kentucky Derby Museum, one as an inventory/control stock associate and the other as a customer service lead with their gift shop. More sales. more retail. not at all in the actual museum/historical part of the company, but a foot in the door is a foot in the door right? But one was again, part time, but even less money than I'm making at Penney's at only 8 an hour so I told her after considering all the factors and the wage, I could not afford relocation should the offer be extended so I politely declined the in person interview as I did not want her to go to the trouble. For the customer service lead position, I had two phone interviews and the retail manager was incredibly nice. But the cons of it were that this was sales, sales, sales. entirely sales. it was full time and had vacation and benefits and its a year until i am cut loose from my parent's insurance. but if wanted to work retail- which i have been for two years now- i can do that without relocating while saving up until i can afford to move.

and this is all on top of me accepting a job offer from Dollar General (as many hours as i could get, started at min wage of 7.25, but fifteen minutes from my house) and my first day was supposed to be this Monday, but then I had an interview this past Tuesday with First National Bank and was offered the job two and half hours after the interview. I start as a part time teller, 9.75 an hour with a cap of 30 hours, March the 8th. I've had seven interviews this past month and I just feel ragged.

I still feel like I've really screwed myself out of a good opportunity. I keep gauging my successes against those of friends I graduated with and seeing them do well compared to where I've been makes me feel inadequate. After two years of applying and applying and trying and failing and failing over and over again with no set path or end point in sight, I don't feel like I'm in a position to turn down anything in my field, do I have that luxury? And I feel like "well if I turn this down what fucking opportunity do I have left" and my family doesn't understand when I try to articulate it.

Screw the idea that my living in Louisville made me absolutely MISERABLE and homesick while I wasn't interning, this is what I want, right? :*) Maybe working two jobs again will just leave me too brain dead and exhausted to worry about it.
wardofregret: (Rebecca Chambers)
On more happy news I would like to say that I am over the moon that RE5 and RE6 are coming to PS4 and XBOX One. I look forward to finally playing with my friends that have the Playstation version as for so long I just had Xbox360! RE6 may be a polarizing mess of a game but it's MY MESS. I've bought RE5 three times already because the hours I spent playing mercenaries scratched the disc beyond recognition. what is a fourth
wardofregret: (Default)
Also this evening my dad said "I like Trump because he says what he thinks" and this is it, this the point where I am ready to be put into my grave,

(my dad is the type of man to say the n-word but it's ok! he has a black friend!)
wardofregret: (Yuuri Kozukata)
possible spoilers for those who have not played the game or gotten the chance to watch a playthrough. mainly i wanted to share my favorite bit of dialogue in the game so far, a scene that really touched me emotionally







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